TO MARK MENTAL HEALTH ACTION DAY, WE ASKED SOME MEMBERS OF THE WELLBEING COMMUNITY TO SHARE SOME ACTIONS THEY TAKE TO PRIORITISE THEIR MENTAL HEALTH. TO MARK MENTAL HEALTH ACTION DAY, WE ASKED SOME MEMBERS OF THE WELLBEING COMMUNITY TO SHARE SOME ACTIONS THEY TAKE TO PRIORITISE THEIR MENTAL HEALTH.

I realised that if I wanted to regain my mental health I must unlearn denial of anger.
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“Depression is anger turned inwards” – my Psychiatrist.

Like many people, particularly women, I grew up believing I should never be angry. Various influences taught me that it is bad to be an angry woman — she is ugly, untrustworthy, and unhealthy. I became expert at denying myself anything resembling anger, avoiding conflict, taking responsibility for maintaining harmony, and never having a strong opinion.

At 33, I experienced a profound loss that triggered a major depressive breakdown. Sitting in front of my psychiatrist week after week, I gradually began to understand his statement. Anger is an essential step in the grieving process, but because I couldn’t allow myself to even acknowledge anger I wasn’t able to grieve and move on from my loss. Over the years, a repressive toxicity collected inside me, condensed over decades, and had finally imploded. I was pulled into a blackhole of depression where my ability to feel anything was gone. All that existed was a robotic sense of nothingness. I was trapped in the vacuum of depression for 13 months.

I became expert at denying myself anything resembling anger, avoiding conflict, taking responsibility for maintaining harmony, and never having a strong opinion.

Several years later, I’ve experienced several different types of grief including the loss of: a belief system, people I’ve loved, faith in those I’ve trusted, an organisation and team I co-created, a perception of my identity and contribution in the world. With each loss the invasive thoughts of depression and anxiety attacks have resurfaced.

While I’m still terrified of depression and what it takes away from me each time, the length of my episodes have decreased as I’ve gathered tools that increase my awareness of when I’m repressing anger and skills to redirect the process towards allowing myself to feel and work through it.

The journey is often one step forward and two steps back as I clumsily learn to explore expressions of anger. But I’m making messy progress.

Tools that help me realise I’m repressing anger :

  • Weekly Therapy: Being completely honest with my psychologist about my symptoms and thoughts.
  • Keeping a list of my cognitive biases and unhelpful assumptions that I can refer to and ask myself if I am unwittingly applying them. A few example: I must never show anger; I must always improve a situation; I must not be a burden to others).
  • Let others around me know what signals to look for and how to gently ask me if that might be what’s happening when they notice those signals.
  • Dream analysis with my psychologist or psychiatrist.
  • Time in nature to allow space for subconscious thoughts to rise to consciousness.

Skills I use to redirect myself towards working through anger:

  • Saying out loud to someone I can trust, ‘I’m angry–here’s why…’.
  • Writing about why I might be angry and why I might be repressing that reaction.
  • Gradual exposure therapy exercises set by my psychologist.
  • Reading about why it’s not unusual to repress anger and the benefits of unlearning it (the book, Rage Becomes Her was a great example of this).
  • Meditation focused on awareness and acceptance of anger.
  • Controlled destruction (I went to a smash room on one occasion; took a hammer to a watermelon in my back garden on another).
  • Finding those who understand the type of situation that made me angry and discussing to gauge if anger seems to be a normal or appropriate response.
  • Asking others what their strategies are for appropriately and healthily acknowledging, expressing, and processing anger.

My hope is to eventually feel comfortable in acknowledging, experiencing, and expressing anger in a way I’m confident is productive and appropriate —regardless of what other people think. Because what could be more beautiful, honest, and healthy than being able to embrace the entire emotional spectrum of the very human condition of love and loss.

Bio

Jessamyn Shams-Lau was previously co-CEO of the Peery Foundation, where she implements and advocates for grantee-centric philanthropy, aiming to minimize the power dynamic inherent to grant-making. She is creator of Do Good Better, a university curriculum for social change leaders, and co-wrote and illustrated the book Unicorns Unite: How Nonprofits and Foundations Can Build EPIC Partnerships with Jane Leu and Vu Le.

GUIDING NEW DAILY RITUALS IN COVID-19 AND BEYONDGUIDING NEW DAILY RITUALS IN COVID-19 AND BEYOND

By Alana Cookman, Organisational Wellbeing Lead for The Wellbeing Project

“I miss my commute” is something I thought no-one would ever say.  But now it feels like everyone is saying it. Why is something that was the bane of many a working day, suddenly being remembered as a cherished time? Did the crowded metro provide that much needed human contact? Perhaps it is one of the many everyday things we have lost and are mourning. It’s actually quite likely that we are missing the transition from Place A to Place B because it allowed us time to depart Role A and psychologically and emotionally arrive in Role B.  

It turns out that role transitions pre-pandemic had a much more important task in our everyday lives than we gave them credit for. They supported crucial psychological detachment and a mindset shift that we are fast realizing is missing, as we live out all our roles from one confined place. Whether it was a walk in the park, or a gym session after a stressful day, or listening to music on our way to work, these activities, whether accidentally or intentionally ritualized, help support us ‘land’ in our various roles in a way that feels spacious – with less chance of stress and tension from the various parts seeping in to each other. How do you manage the crossing of your roles now?  A cup of tea, a five minute meditation, a listen to your favorite podcast on a walk round the block, as you used to do on your morning commute, that helps you get into ‘work mode’? My daughter misses her many daily and weekly rituals from school. The activities that separate morning and afternoon, play time and work time, celebration and connection, endings and beginnings.  The ‘golden time’ that makes work time that much more motivating. Ritualised activities can be invigorating or calming depending on what you need,  and provide a welcome element of predictability for centering and grounding in times of such flux, and for honouring and acknowledging the change and loss happening so rapidly around us.  

“Ritual practice is the activity of cultivating extraordinary ordinariness. It is necessary, because human activity has a kind of entropy about it; life, like love, runs down. Things get tiresome and difficult. Body and soul cry out for something different, hence the impetus to ritualize. But if the ritually extraordinary becomes a goal or is severed from ordinariness, it loses its capacity to transform, which, after all, is what rites of passage are supposed to do.” Ronal Grimes

There is a finer sense of awareness on what nourishes us, energises us and depletes us, as we tend to all parts of our lives in one physical space, too. Our shifting understanding of what work-life balance means to us is on our minds.  What do we want this to look like when some more predictable routine returns? Rather than think of work-life balance as another thing to be achieved or fixed, it’s helpful to think of it as a continuum, with integration on one end and segmentation on another. While we are more on the integrated end of things at the moment, what can we learn from segmentors? 

This is where the concept of micro transitions come in handy, because they help ease or put up the boundaries we need to support us transition from one role to another, depending on where on the continuum you want to sit.  And that’s the beautiful thing with continuums; polarities aren’t problems to be solved, but rather parts of the same whole that can be managed, depending on your own needs and contexts.  Polarity mapping is a tool that helps us adopt a ‘both, and’  as opposed to an ‘either,or’ mindset, something that is increasingly helpful in these complex times where many outcomes are likely to emerge in ways we aren’t accustomed to.  It is a helpful process to use when you are faced with what seems like an opposing or contradictory situation and need a moment to reflect on where feels like a healthier place for you to be, both personally and in your professional lives. 

The urgency of attending to immediate, and often unknown, needs (whilst being very distracted) during the first two months of the Covid-19 pandemic unfolding, is making way for different concerns, as we continue on in our worlds of ‘sheltering in place’. Many people emerging from what felt like a months of back-to-back Zoom calls are craving an element of sustainability to their days and weeks ahead. Accepting a possible longer haul at home has us wondering how we can create space in between our calls, roles, days and weekends, to enable a healthier way of being, working, and living. How are you showing up and switching off in this time of blurred boundaries?  What do your in-between spaces look like? Do you even have any?  Are your kids sharing breakfast with your team in little squares on your laptop screen? Are your work issues seeping into your relationships? How many times have you checked email in bed recently? Perhaps you aren’t working right now, which could be causing worry or guilt.  Some of us don’t want to do anything and are anxious we aren’t being creative, productive or even reflective enough. Some of us want to be doing much more to help others in more pressing need. We are craving human connection but are drained by virtual meetings. It seems our working selves are in a flux of paradox and polarity. 

Even though lockdowns are easing globally, it’s very likely that it will be a slow process and remote work in some form, is here to stay for many of us. Given this largely unplanned merger  of life and work, it’s a good time to think about how we approach our different roles, wherever you sit on the compress or expanse scale.  How are you embodying your various roles in ways that you want to, without leaving the physical space you are in? How are you creating in-between spaces, or micro-transitions, that help you show up and switch off in ways that support you and those around you? Can you share any rituals that support these transitions in your extraordinary everyday life?  Being well and working well do not have to be separate ends of the pole.

What differences can you make now that your body and soul will be thankful for? Whatever your answer might be, know that this is the moment where you can design the new you.

About the author:
Alana Cookman is Organisational Wellbeing Lead at The Wellbeing Project  which is exploring and demonstrating how individual and organisational wellbeing can be cultivated, to catalyse a shift towards a more human-centred culture in the social change sector.

How To Find Peace Of MindHow To Find Peace Of Mind

Peace of mind and harmony – one of the prerequisites for finding a complete and happy life. We feel more confident and full when we are in a state of inner peace! This is the state when we are balanced, attentive, and conscious. Being in critical situations or circumstances that are not comfortable for us, peace begins to leave us. But having resumed classes that help to find inner silence, life is gradually improving again. Many people pass through this circle. From this, we can conclude: “If you do not have time for rest, it means that it is necessary for you.”

What is peace of mind, and why do we need it?

Peace of mind is a state of harmony with oneself and with the whole world. But above all, the order is a balance. If we compare the soul with a musical instrument, then the inner calm state is when the strings of the soul sound harmoniously and naturally. The sound is beautiful and pleasant for everyone! But when we are tense and fussy, the music will be strained, unnatural, and unpleasant.

Staying in the peace of mind, we are full of energy and in a good mood! We efficiently manage to resist the illnesses and bad attitude of others, and we are better at doing any work. We become more creative; we analyze better and solve problems faster. When peace of mind leaves us, and we get out of balance, the energy drops, we attract depression and illness. During the internal stress, we do not get much as we would like, and we make more mistakes.

Every time as soon as we get angry, fussing in vain, or fall into depression, etc., we seem to spill precious energy from our vessel of the soul. This energy is challenging to replenish! Think twice before the next time, indiscreetly, get out of yourself, start to get nervous, angry, think negatively, think, speak, and fuss about it in vain.

Peace of mind is a natural state for a person; that is why it is so necessary and desirable for us! When it disappears, we begin to experience discomfort and uncertainty. On the subconscious mind, we want to return to this state. There is a desire to “be yourself” or take a walk in the park to restore spiritual harmony.

The inner peace of mind is confused by many with lethargy, laziness, or apathy. But it is not so! You can make an active external activity while maintaining inner peace. An event even, as a rule, turns out to be an order of magnitude better when you are in a state of inner calm. This is the state in which you are collected, aware, and attentive.

Only within yourself can one find peace and confidence. There is no peace and stability in the world around us, and everything around is in a state of constant changeability. How can we cope with the unpredictability of life? Only by accepting it! Tell yourself: “I am ready for all surprises and meet them with calm clarity.” Make a decision: “Whatever happens, I can do it in the best way possible.” What is happening around is not so important, what is happening inside is essential! The ship does not sink when it is in water, and it drops when water is in it. Whatever the fuss and chaos you are in, it is much more critical to maintain inner peace of mind. You lose if you lose your awareness, tense, angry, or hurt. What matters is not the circumstances, but how we react to them!

How to keep the mind in peace under any circumstances?

• Adoption. Take everything as it is; it will give you ease. Learn to accept people and circumstances as they are, without the desire to adjust to their standards and wishes. Also, learn to accept and love yourself as you are, with all the mistakes and shortcomings!
• Attention. Remove the focus of attention from the stimulus and focus it on yourself, on your inner world, on the sensations in the body. Abstracted from external factors and irritants.
• Deep relaxation. Remove anxiety, haste, anger, resentment, etc. If there is tension in the body, remove it. Be inner relaxed!
• Breath. Watch your breath; breath evenly and calmly, with a full chest. Exhalation should not be shorter in the duration of inhalation. Take a deep breath and exhale. Keep breathing evenly and measured.
• Awareness. Be as conscious and collected as possible.
• Think positive. Stop creating negative thoughts, and if such people have still made their way into the consciousness, then watch them, watch how they leave you and dissolve, like waves from a stone thrown into the lake. Try to think well of others, about yourself, about life.
• Respect. Respect yourself and others.
• Confidence. Be confident in yourself. Encourage yourself; tell yourself, “I will succeed.”
• Naturalness. Try to be natural, relaxed, and liberated.
• Smile. Smile often. Smile always looking in the mirror, communicating with other people. Smile from the heart and be in a joyful mood. Treat everything with humor!

Be, without unnecessary thoughts. Be present in the current moment. Be a bystander. Watch the events taking place removed; track the causes of events, without feelings. Just be.

If you want to protect yourself from all adversity, you have chosen the wrong planet. Here we are always faced with situations pushing us out of the comfort zone and unbalancing. We must always be prepared for this challenge. There is always lesson to extract, a positive experience, and an opportunity to move on!

About the author

Melisa Marzett is a content writer who is currently working for http://www.essay-editor.net/ and enjoying life just the way it is. She lives in harmony and peace with herself and loves what she does for a living. She loves to move around, and she cannot stand still, traveling is something that excites her. Also, she is a healthy lifestyle and a gym enthusiast, so she makes it to where she can find a sports center to go to whatever place she visits.

WE ARE THRILLED TO START EXPLORING THE ISSUE OF INNER WELLBEING IN THE FIELD OF SOCIAL CHANGE MORE BROADLY – LOOKING AT “HOW ARE WE DOING?” – TOGETHER WITH IMPACT HUB AND THE FORD FOUNDATION, WHO ARE TWO KEY ANCHORS WITHIN THIS 6-MONTH SURVEY PROCESS. WE ARE THRILLED TO START EXPLORING THE ISSUE OF INNER WELLBEING IN THE FIELD OF SOCIAL CHANGE MORE BROADLY – LOOKING AT “HOW ARE WE DOING?” – TOGETHER WITH IMPACT HUB AND THE FORD FOUNDATION, WHO ARE TWO KEY ANCHORS WITHIN THIS 6-MONTH SURVEY PROCESS.

By Catalina Cock Duque

Building a peaceful, democratic and inclusive country is a long term challenge which requires systemic changes to face the roots of our problems. Such changes imply transformations in politics, power, relationships, attitudes and values. In order to achieve this, alliances between the public, private and social sectors are necessary, as well as between leaders with diverse approaches who can support alliances to adopt new ways of doing things.

This may sound obvious, but working with different actors can be difficult. For instance, the building of trust is a great challenge and, as has been expressed by Katherine Milligan and Nicole Schwab in their article “The Inner Path to Become a Systems Entrepreneur”, competition over financial resources for social investment discourage collaboration, and there could be rivalries over who gets the credit within a coalition around a specific issue. How to cultivate a context where egos can be left aside, and the common interest comes before individual interest? Such question must be answered in order to achieve structural changes.

There is increasing evidence that the inner condition of a leader is crucial to achieve meaningful changes, and that it can be cultivated through a path leading to greater awareness of oneself and to inner well-being. Along the same line, great names in the field of social entrepreneurship such as Skoll, Synergos, Ashoka and Schwab Foundation, are promoting a global movement, through their “Wellbeing Project”, to support inner growth as an essential aspect of social change.

There are many options to advance along an inner path, including a deep process of self-knowledge. Getting to know ourselves in all our dimensions allows us to project our greater strengths and to work on our weaknesses. The mere fact of becoming aware of the latter may allow us greater control over our emotions, such as fear or anger, which in turn may undermine confidence and hamper the building of bridges between different sectors. Through inner work, confidence in oneself may be developed, as well as the ability to listen, empathize and follow your intuition, among other crucial skills in the construction of common projects departing from difference.

Investing in the inner well-being of leaders is a way to support the sustainability of their initiatives, or, is it possible for a leader to reach his or her maximum potential when emotional health is at risk or human relations are weak? Will it be possible for his or her impact and leadership to prevail in the long term? I don’t think so. When people invest in their personal well-being, when their deeper purpose is clear, when their greater inner connection is achieved, they reach their extended-self or their greater-self; according to Peggy Dulany, founder of Synergos, such people have an open heart, which can feel gratefulness and access more creativity; they are connected with a greater whole, they know who they are and they like who they are.

If we get closer to our extended self we can feel more confident and connected in a broader sense, and thus explore our maximum potential as human beings. This is crucial to building high potential teams, networks and movements, to overcoming egos and personal interests, and to understanding the complexity of our reality from different perspectives. Only by advancing along our individual path, will we be able to advance in the political, economic, social and cultural changes Colombia requires to build a fairer, more peaceful and inclusive society.

``AS IMPORTANT AS IT IS TO TAKE CARE OF OTHERS IT IS ACTUALLY TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.`` ``AS IMPORTANT AS IT IS TO TAKE CARE OF OTHERS IT IS ACTUALLY TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.``

Jose Mari Luzarraga is building a generation of changemaking entrepreneurs by re-defining education based on team learning and experimentation. He is the creator of the Leinn degree and co-founded Mondragon Team Academy, (MTA), global teams that adapt the vision of Mondragon by inserting it into the education system. Bachelor and Master’s degree students create people centered enterprises that generate economic and social impact through teampreneurship and learning by doing.

“The Wellbeing Project arrived at a crucial moment in my life. After 15 years fully devoted to serve others as a social entrepreneur, I was nearly at the edge of burnout. My life consists to reach and serve a growing number of yougsters, while dealing with many difficult issues on my own. I feel, accept pain, and suffering in my everyday life as something needed to serve better and it was having a negative impact personally and family wise.

This personal awareness of where and how I was, only came with The Wellbeing Project. Before the program I was focused on more: reach more and accept more challenges.

For me The Wellbeing Project showed me that “I could not serve and take care of others if I do not serve and take care of myself”, that we need to love others as we love ourselves. It is not about saying YES to others and NO to yourself, but the only way on the long run is to learn how to say YES to others and YES to yourself.

Throughout this personal transformation experience with great social entrepreneurs and human beings something became clear to me. On the one hand we need to accept, understand and embrace that being a social entrepreneur requires huge devotion and strength while: dealing with daily and tricky challenges, opening new paths where there are none, breaking and evolving thought models, making what is hidden or unknown to seen and understood… Being social entrepreneurs, we have the crucial, difficult and fascinating mission to “challenge the status-quo for a better world and humanity”.

On the other hand, we need to understand that the only way to do this, is to start with yourself. In the long run I cannot bring light to others if I do not light up myself. And for doing that, we need to load ourselves with the proper tools and activities to trigger the wellbeing and personal cultivation process. Wellbeing is a “life long journey”. It is a daily learning process.

The Wellbeing Project supported me with: “the understanding and awareness shift”, “providing the proper needed tools and activities” to start and nurture wellbeing, while not living this alone but “team learning” together with peers sharing the same learning journey.” JML

``LEARNING TO LOVE AND TREASURE BREATHING HAS CHANGED MY LIFE.” ``LEARNING TO LOVE AND TREASURE BREATHING HAS CHANGED MY LIFE.”

By Kildine de Saint Hilaire and Andrea Coleman

“I am English. Very English. We were taught, as we grew up, that showing your feelings drew disapproval. You must be strong, put on a brave face, show no weakness. The environment was tough for earlier generations. Not enough food, horrible cold, world wars, families separated and people working unreasonably hard during the industrial revolution. It was the way, those earlier generations thought: to make the young tough, resilient and they will survive. Provision of health care then was poor and mental health was treated by the expression ‘pull yourself together’.”

Andrea Coleman is a woman who inspires both admiration and motivation. Her achievements reveal her strengths, and her personality encourages kindness. Her journey has led her to develop Riders for Health, the organization she co-founded with her husband Barry Coleman in 1996. Andrea grew up believing that motorcycles were synonymous with the possibility of escaping. She embraced the motorcycle world to leave the place that she was in. “It was my route to freedom”, she explains when reflecting on her upbringing. Her first husband was a motorcyclist who had an accident while competing. After the accident, Andrea explains she was lost and did not know how to grieve, “I thought how to deal with grief was to be very busy and create something else.”

Andrea put all her effort and means into the creation of Riders for Health, an organisation that uses vehicles to deliver healthcare within multiple African countries. It defies a persisting status quo: the neglect of the use of vehicles in the field of development. With Riders for Health, vehicles are the pillar element. They bridge the distance between rural communities and health care. To say that building an organisation is a challenge is an understatement. It becomes a life mission that takes a lot out of those involved. “The last thing that I was doing was listening to myself,” explains Andrea, who suffered from anxiety and exhaustion. The more out of tune she was with her inner-self, the more Andrea was pushing her mind and body to exhaustion. Burnout has become the great epidemic of our generation, one that can have extreme consequences on individuals and their surroundings. Always pushing more and further can only last for a certain time and to a certain extent.”

“During The Wellbeing Project I realised I have been holding my breath for my whole life. Learning to love and treasure breathing has changed my life.”

As a participant in The Wellbeing Project’s Inner Development Program, Andrea decided to learn how to confront and deal with her internal angst. First, Andrea approached the language of wellbeing. Second, she delved into a research and understanding of the meaning behind the dialect of wellbeing. By giving herself the time to reflect on these concepts and how to adapt them to her life, she gained confidence and a significant change of attitude towards others. Andrea took part in a journey of self-exploration starting from within that came to have an extensive reach towards her outside world.

“I had no idea if I would be accepted onto the program and I had no idea what it would mean or if it would or could be helpful. But I knew I had to find some way to manage the pain I was experiencing. With my English background I found it hard to accept the idea of loving myself but I found out how to love the gifts I have been given, to know that caring for myself is not something to be ashamed of and to feel the same sympathy for myself as I would for others. I was taught the mechanism to find peace in looking at the sky at night, in the trees around me and to rest into the knowledge that there are people who love me. And I am worth being loved.”

Regarding her learnings, Andrea comments she discovered, “how to relate to people in a way I didn’t know how to before.” In addition, she has learned to let herself do things she enjoys and that make her happy. The emotion of guilt is no longer part of the equation. Andrea gives her personal take on wellbeing as a process that enabled her to feel capable and acquire a balance between responsibility and self-care.

“I hope I will always be open to accepting new ways of being as a result of my experience and I hope that I can continue to help others to be open to it too.“

Since her experience with The Wellbeing Project, Andrea has developed a new project: Two Wheels For Life. The organisation aims to develop and fundraise for Riders for Health and focus on motorcycles to ensure that life-saving healthcare reaches those in need. Wellbeing is a constant learning for Andrea. It offers her alignment and confidence while she remains the ambitious change-maker she is at her core.

“I DON’T THINK THAT THERE IS ONE PERFECT TIME FOR SOMEBODY TO UNDERGO A PROCESS OF WELLBEING.” “I DON’T THINK THAT THERE IS ONE PERFECT TIME FOR SOMEBODY TO UNDERGO A PROCESS OF WELLBEING.”

By Kabir Vajpeyi and Jacquelyn Salvador

There are moments in life when we become acutely, almost obsessively focused on what we’re doing. This focus can be useful for making progress in specific areas, but it can also cause us to forget about the context and other areas that are just as important. This is the issue Kabir Vajpeyi ran into when he became enveloped by his work with learning and child development. He’d been neglecting the human element — both within himself and for others. Slowly but surely, the pressure that he put on himself began to make it difficult to relate to people, and left him feeling rushed and worn down.

“If someone said they weren’t feeling well, my thought wasn’t how to take care of them,” Kabir explains, “it was ‘who’s going to finish this job.’”

His self-imposed drive to work and make progress also prevented him from spending time and connecting with his family. He worked late, and he noticed his personality taking a turn for the worse as the demand increased and took a toll on his energy and emotions. It was Kabir’s wife who finally expressed her mounting concerns for his wellbeing, which led to Kabir’s participation in The Wellbeing Project. Within the program’s community of support and wellness-centered retreats for entrepreneurs and changemakers, Kabir came face-to-face with the importance of taking care of his own wellbeing. He realized that it was critical in order to make a greater impact through his work.

“I was spending something so precious and tender, rather ruthlessly – life.

To me, the well-being journey has been literally a poignant, beautiful pause. A pause to stay still, sit down, look inside, feel, become aware and nourish my inner-being. And moving on with heightened self-awareness, repose and quietude, profoundly more sensitivity and responsiveness in life.

It made me focus on myself, without any guilt. I understood that working on self is not being self-centric. In fact, it is the most unique and beautiful gift to oneself and everyone around.

Earlier my work was my only identity. Now, this is no longer true. Now, at first, I am human being – a son, a brother, a classmate, a husband, a father…a friend.

Earlier my relationship with everyone was largely functional or work-centric. I would find myself helpless and even hopeless on matters related to relationship. With uncompromising support of some of the most outstanding resource persons at the Well-being project, I was able to work on almost all my significant relationships – with my own self, my attitudes, with my immediate and larger family, my friends, my neighbours, my colleagues at work, my work.

Later, on my own, I worked with my clients and everyone whom I meet every day. I discovered the value of being humane, kind and compassionate with everyone. I now practice it. It has made a huge difference in the quality of my relationships with everyone. This is now positively impacting not just me, but with almost everyone whom I am engaging at personal, social or professional level.

I discovered that I cannot change the world at all. Unless I change, nothing will change around me. I must be able to take responsibility and not blame others. To begin with, the one thing I can immediately change is, how I respond to what is going on around me. Matters may not have changed much in substance around me, but now, rather than reacting, I am able to sensitively contemplate and respond to it. I have become better at it. This has reduced my stress and anxiety substantially and I am able to respond to most difficult situations rather calmly – with greater sensitivity and patience.

I took upon a meditation practice and this has qualitatively changed the way now I feel and think. This has fundamentally changed my state from being anxious and stressed to being aware and peaceful. It has also changed how I engage with different people; how I work – how I am able to find solutions, contemplate and deliver them to the society and the government.

I realized that well-being is not just for me. It is everyone, everywhere in the nature. I cannot keep it to myself. If I am able to experience and live it, so could everyone around me too. I am striving for this at my own level.

I know that it’s a journey worth continuing…”

In looking back, one of the most interesting revelations Kabir had from The Wellbeing Project was that the greatest work and progress was made not by focusing on the work itself, but by shifting toward a focus on the participant’s deeper needs and elements. In fact, even though he and the other participants were all deeply involved in and committed to their work, they rarely ever talked about work during their participation in The Wellbeing Project. That’s what created such a nurturing atmosphere for change and growth. The ability to slow down and really focus on the human element created a powerful foundational shift within Kabir. He’s now seen firsthand the importance of inner wellbeing, which enables us to do our greatest good. That element has created positive effects in his personal emotions, his relationships, his work interactions and his overall work.

Kabir is now a strong advocate of taking action to set the process of wellbeing into motion, whenever and wherever we notice that need. “You don’t need to first burn out and then get into [wellbeing],” Kabir offers as encouragement, “whenever you realize its significance, that’s when to start realizing who you are, what is inside you, what you can offer.”