By Kabir Vajpeyi and Jacquelyn Salvador
There are moments in life when we become acutely, almost obsessively focused on what we’re doing. This focus can be useful for making progress in specific areas, but it can also cause us to forget about the context and other areas that are just as important. This is the issue Kabir Vajpeyi ran into when he became enveloped by his work with learning and child development. He’d been neglecting the human element — both within himself and for others. Slowly but surely, the pressure that he put on himself began to make it difficult to relate to people, and left him feeling rushed and worn down.
“If someone said they weren’t feeling well, my thought wasn’t how to take care of them,” Kabir explains, “it was ‘who’s going to finish this job.’”
His self-imposed drive to work and make progress also prevented him from spending time and connecting with his family. He worked late, and he noticed his personality taking a turn for the worse as the demand increased and took a toll on his energy and emotions. It was Kabir’s wife who finally expressed her mounting concerns for his wellbeing, which led to Kabir’s participation in The Wellbeing Project. Within the program’s community of support and wellness-centered retreats for entrepreneurs and changemakers, Kabir came face-to-face with the importance of taking care of his own wellbeing. He realized that it was critical in order to make a greater impact through his work.
“I was spending something so precious and tender, rather ruthlessly – life.
To me, the well-being journey has been literally a poignant, beautiful pause. A pause to stay still, sit down, look inside, feel, become aware and nourish my inner-being. And moving on with heightened self-awareness, repose and quietude, profoundly more sensitivity and responsiveness in life.
It made me focus on myself, without any guilt. I understood that working on self is not being self-centric. In fact, it is the most unique and beautiful gift to oneself and everyone around.
Earlier my work was my only identity. Now, this is no longer true. Now, at first, I am human being – a son, a brother, a classmate, a husband, a father…a friend.
Earlier my relationship with everyone was largely functional or work-centric. I would find myself helpless and even hopeless on matters related to relationship. With uncompromising support of some of the most outstanding resource persons at the Well-being project, I was able to work on almost all my significant relationships – with my own self, my attitudes, with my immediate and larger family, my friends, my neighbours, my colleagues at work, my work.